Foolish Me Page 16

  “No food or water. Got it.”

  “Good. She’ll stay with us overnight so we can keep an eye on her.”

  “Do you have to?” I’d be alone in the apartment, and right now I really didn’t want to be alone. Too many thoughts crowded my mind.

  “It’s the doctor’s policy. We want to make sure there are no side effects from the anesthesia. We’ll see you in the morning. Come in a little early, all right?”

  “Yes. Bye.” I swallowed.

  I looked at my kitten. She was stalking her catnip mouse, her belly flat to the floor and her little tail whipping back and forth.

  “Guess what, Miss Su? We’re going for a ride tomorrow!”

  She abandoned her mouse, came to me, and rubbed her head against my ankle. Wills and I had found a groomer who did an excellent job on her long coat, and she had come to associate “going for a ride” with paying a visit to the man.

  Poor, unsuspecting little kitty. Was she going to hate me when she realized what I’d had done to her?

  Dammit. Wills was supposed to be here to do this with me. I picked up the kitten and spent the rest of the day cradling her and playing with her.

  Chapter 14

  TWO DAYS later, I drove to the vet’s to pick her up. I set her Sherpa bag on the counter and pulled out a credit card. “How is she?”

  The receptionist smiled at me. “She’s fine, Mr. Bascopolis. The same as she was all the times you called.” She took the card, swiped it through the machine, and waited for the transaction to be approved.

  “Well, it was the first time she was away from home. Was she a good girl? Did she behave herself?”

  “She was good as gold. And she missed you very much.”

  “She did?”

  “Yes.” She pressed a button under the desk, and a young woman dressed in green scrubs came from the back. “Mr. Bascopolis is here for the American Bobtail.”

  “Ah. Tiramisu is a real sweetheart, Mr. Bascopolis.”

  I liked hearing that.

  “Now, let Betty take Tiramisu’s bag, and she’ll bring her right out. Meanwhile, here’s all the information you’ll need. Keep her on a light diet for today. If you see any redness, swelling, or bleeding, or if she looks like she’s in pain, bring her back in, even if it’s over the weekend. We always have someone here. Otherwise, her stitches will dissolve in a week or so, and we won’t need to see her again until next year, when she’ll be due for her yearly shots.”

  Betty brought out the Sherpa bag. I opened it and looked at my kitten.

  “Poppa’s here, Miss Su!”

  “Mrrow?”

  “I know, I’m sorry, puss, but we’re going home now, okay?”

  “Mrrow.”

  I kissed the top of her head, and after closing the bag, I signed the credit card slip, put my wallet away, and the two of us went home.

  The first thing I did, even before letting her out of her bag and making sure she had fresh water, was check to see if I had any messages. The light was flashing, and my heart rolled over in relief.

  “You have one new message.”

  “Thank you, God.” That was all I wanted. I pressed the button.

  “Hey, Sweets, it’s Tim. We haven’t spoken in a while, so I just thought I’d touch base. Let’s see. The pub is doing pretty well. We were in the black again last month. Thanks for going over the books for me; that helped a lot. Cris had me really scared. He had a nasty bout of food poisoning a few weeks back, but he’s better now. He sends his best, by the way. How are things going with your guy? He’d better be treating you well. I hear that Paul’s boy might be up for a part in a movie. Do you think that’s for real? Well, I’ve got to get back downstairs. I’m expecting a delivery. Give me a call and let me know how things are going, okay? Bye, babe.”

  I sighed and decided against calling him just then. While I was glad to hear things were going well with the pub and with Cris, I wasn’t in the mood for small talk.

  Miss Su meowed, reminding me she was still in her bag, and I let her out and filled her bowl with fresh water. She disappeared into the laundry room, no doubt to use the litter pan.

  I couldn’t call Wills’s family to ask if they’d heard from him. Why cause them what was probably needless worry?

  Calling Vincent was the best idea I could come up with. He never worried, and he always knew how to get in touch with Wills. The problem was, each time I called, all I got was his machine, and I could see how something like, “Vince, it’s Theo. I seem to have misplaced my lover. Help!” would go over with him.

  The message I finally did leave was simply, “I need to talk to you. Call me when you can, please?”

  Miss Su came to me and butted her head against my leg. I stooped and picked her up, but I gripped her too tightly, and she meowed in protest. “Sorry, puss,” I murmured in her ear.

  She swiped her sandpaper tongue across my chin. Apparently there were no hard feelings.

  MARCH HAD arrived a week ago. The one good thing about tax season was that it kept me too busy to worry during the day over the fact that Wills hadn’t called. The nights, though, were another story. I’d grown used to sharing my bed with him, to rolling over and being able to snuggle against him and hold him in my arms, and to go back to sleeping alone was harder than I’d anticipated. The only way I could fall asleep was if I was holding his pillow.

  And as the days passed and all my calls to him continued to be shunted to voice mail, my worries escalated.

  Wills could have had a car accident and could be languishing in some hospital room. I thought of the accident that, according to his father, had nearly killed him.

  His plane could have crashed, and he could be lying in some morgue, unclaimed, or maybe worse, claimed, waked, and buried, his family not thinking our relationship important enough to tell me.

  He could have been mugged, and I pictured his body decomposing in some alley.

  It affected my sleep. I began having nightmares with all of those scenarios and another one that was even worse: Wills looking at me as if I were scum, his lip curled, his eyes cold. “We’re through, Bascopolis,” he said in that one. “I want nothing more to do with you.”

  “But I love you!”

  “That’s your problem. You waited too long to tell me.” He shrugged. “I’ve found someone who isn’t afraid to say the words, someone I really love, who’s worthy of that love.”

  “But you said you loved me!”

  “And you believed me? You’re a pathetic whore. You wanted to be loved so badly you were willing to believe whatever I told you.”

  “But….”

  “Face it, Bascopolis. You’re not worth loving. You were always a whore, and you’ll always be one. I’m leaving you.”

  “I’m leaving you.” Those words followed me up through the layers of sleep, and I’d wake, shaking and nauseous, my face wet with tears.

  THE PHONE rang, and I scrambled to answer it. “Wills?”

  “No. It’s Vincent.”

  I sighed. “Oh. Vince. Hi. You’re home.”

  “No shit. I got your message. What’s up?”

  “It’s… I know Wills is on a job, but….”

  “Jesus, Bascopolis, is that what all those hang-ups were about?”

  “Well, I….”

  “You know I gave him permission to let you know his flight had gotten in,” he started impatiently, “but beyond that—”

  “That’s just it, Vince. He hasn’t called. I haven’t heard from him at all.”

  “Not at all?”

  “No, not even to let me know he’d arrived at… well, wherever he’d arrived at, and every time I tried calling him, I got his voice mail. Now….” I paused for a breath. “Now I don’t even get that.”

  “Goddammit.” He sounded grim, and I swallowed. “All right, Theo. Did he say who he talked to, who assigned him this job?”

  “He never mentioned a name, Vince, just called him ‘sir.’ Whoever it was told him he had forty-five
minutes to pack a suitcase and get to Dulles.”

  “That’s cutting it close.”

  “Yeah. He was supposed to pick up his tickets there.”

  “Tickets? Plural?”

  “Yes.”

  “Okay. What did he tell you about the job?”

  “Nothing. He never talks about the job. I assumed someone must have opened an e-mail with one of those viruses attached to it and the whole system shut down, so they needed Wills to clean up the mess.” I didn’t think it would be a good idea to tell my lover’s boss the choice names he’d called those “fucking idiots.” “But it’s been almost four weeks, Vince!”

  “What did he pack?”

  I scrubbed my face. “A couple of suits. A week’s worth of shirts and underwear. His tool belt and work boots. Jeans. Vince, is he…. Do you think he’s all right?”

  “What do you think could have happened to him?”

  “I don’t know. Plane crash. Car accident. He could have gotten mugged—”

  “Mugged?” He choked, and it took him a second to clear his throat. “Matheson is a competent troubleshooter, Theo. He’s fine. Trust me on this.”

  “If… if you say so.”

  “I say so. Now, I’ll look into what’s going on and get back to you, okay?”

  “Okay. Vince? If you talk to Wills….” I tried to think of the most discreet thing to say, then settled for, “You’ll tell him I’ve missed him?”

  “Yeah. Any other messages you’d like me to pass on?”

  “Um—” Just that I loved him. “—no.”

  “Okay.”

  “Thanks, Vince. I really appreciate it.”

  “You’re welcome. By the way, Paul sends his best.”

  “Huh? Were you out in LA?”

  “Yeah. You know Spike’s got a part in one of those teen slasher flicks?”

  “That’s on the level? I know Paul was worried about it. He thought it might be a ruse to get into Spike’s pants.”

  “Yeah, so did I. I flew out to look into it. It’s on the level. His character gets sliced and diced about a quarter of the way through. If his scenes don’t wind up on the cutting-room floor, I guess I’ll have to go see it.”

  “Me too.” I hated that kind of movie, not for the graphic blood and guts, which was what seemed to bother Wills, but because pretty kids had sex and then got killed, almost as if in punishment. Still, it would be a perfect excuse for Wills to climb onto my lap and bury his head against my shoulder. Wills….

  “All right, let me get going now.”

  “Huh? Oh, thanks again, Vince.”

  “Don’t mention it. I’ll be in touch when I can.”

  “Okay. Bye.”

  I wasn’t really surprised when the phone rang later the same day. “Matheson is in one piece, and he’s on his way home.”

  My heart rolled over. He was all right. He was alive. “When… when will he be here?”

  “I’d say not more than a couple of hours.”

  My throat began to ache, and my eyes began to burn. “Thanks, Vince.”

  “You’re welcome. Now is it too much to hope that I won’t find your phone number on my caller ID anytime soon?”

  “Sorry.” I scrubbed my hand over my face. “Don’t… don’t tell Wills I was such a”—baby—“worrywart, please?”

  “Not a problem, Theo. Take care of yourself, okay?”

  “You too, Vince. Bye.” I hung up and squatted down beside the kitten, who was sitting at my feet. “He’s coming home, Miss Su.” Her ears pricked forward, and her hind end quivered, as if she were about to launch herself at me. I opened my arms, and she leaped into them, purring and butting my chin. “Daddy’s coming home!”

  AN ODD thing happened as I vacuumed and dry-mopped, emptied the dishwasher and changed the sheets on the bed. I began to grow angry. Four fucking weeks, and he couldn’t find the time to call me and let me know he was still alive?

  And what the fuck had Vince meant when he’d said Wills had permission to call me? Why the hell should my lover need permission to call me when he was away from home?

  I tamped down my anger. Rent boys couldn’t afford to get angry.

  If Wills was hungry, I’d warm up the leftover pizza in the fridge, or make him some scrambled eggs if he wasn’t in the mood for pizza.

  I hoped he would—

  The hell with that! I wasn’t a rent boy anymore. I lost my temper and clenched my hand so tightly my nails, as stubby as they’d become from my nervous biting of them, left patterns in my palms. Frozen dinners were all that was good enough for him after what he’d put me through. And he’d be lucky if I felt generous enough to nuke them for him.

  I counted to ten in Greek three times, then had to count backward as well before I calmed down enough that my hands stopped shaking. I wanted to be able to shave without slicing my face to ribbons.

  I showered, shaved, and stood in front of my closet, looking over my clothes. My lover probably expected me to wear something that would send him wild with passion, but I was still pissed, and I settled on a pair of button-fly jeans and a flannel shirt. I didn’t bother with underwear, though. He had a tendency to remember everything. He should remember that I had told him once that I never wore underwear when I was going out on a job. Not that I was planning on doing that, but let him wonder. Let him worry.

  Four. Fucking. Weeks!

  “Sorry, Miss Su.” I closed her in the laundry room with her litter pan, water bowl, catnip mouse, and a blanket to curl up on. She was getting too big to spend the night in her Sherpa bag.

  I heard the key in the door, and my anger dissipated. My mouth went dry, and my stomach did flips. I felt as if this was a first date, and I rushed into the foyer just as Wills let himself in.

  “Hi, babe.” He locked the door behind him and let his suitcase and garment bag fall to the floor. “God, it’s good to be home. I’ve—”

  I pounced on him, slammed my mouth against his, and hooked a leg around his thigh, rocking my groin against his. I wanted to crawl inside his skin. I wanted him to crawl inside mine.

  There was no finesse in the kiss, I knew it, and I didn’t care that it was hot and wet and hungry, and so savage I tasted blood. I didn’t fucking care.

  The whimpers and moans were coming from my mouth, but I didn’t care about that either. He was home, he was safe, and he was kissing me back as if it had been years since he’d been kissed instead of weeks.

  I finally released his mouth so we could both breathe.

  “I take it you missed me?” He looked tired, but he didn’t have that drawn, exhausted look on his face, and I knew that no matter what had happened these past four weeks, it hadn’t been one of those jobs I’d come to dread, and I got angry all over again.

  “Y’think? Get naked.” I’d been so worried about him that I’d lost my sense of self. Well, no more. He bottomed for me. I was the one in charge, and I intended to remind him of that from tonight on. “Now, Matheson. I want you now.”

  Wills didn’t seem to realize how close I was to attacking him. He grinned and handed me his overcoat, but instead of hanging it up, I just tossed it aside.

  He grinned again, that lopsided grin, and removed his suit jacket and tie and let them drop to the floor.

  I unbuttoned my jeans, took out my cock, and stroked it, never taking my eyes off him. I needed him… I banished that thought. I’d have him, naked and wanting and aware of who was going to fuck him through the wall, through the floor, through the mattress and into tomorrow.

  His eyes darkened, and a flush mounted his cheeks. He fumbled with the buttons on his shirt, and when they wouldn’t come undone, he tore at them until they popped off.

  He stared at my cock. I wasn’t wearing a condom, and I waited for him to tell me to wait, that I had to suit up. He didn’t say anything, just toed off his shoes and stripped off his trousers and shorts. His hands were shaking.

  I took a packet from my pocket, tore it open, and rolled it on. And I’d h
ave sworn I saw disappointment in his eyes.

  Which was probably just wishful thinking on my part. I popped the top of a tube of lube, slicked my cock, spun him around, and shoved three fingers into him.

  After that…. Sex between us had always been hot, but tonight it was a haze of lust and rut, moans and growls.

  I had him the first time up against the wall in the foyer, pinning his hands to either side of his head while I drove into him. “Say my name.”

  “Theo!”

  He came, but I didn’t.

  The second time I dragged him into the living room and had him on his hands and knees on the rug in front of the fireplace. Still fully dressed, I slammed into him, plowed him, caused him to rock forward with each thrust.

  “Say my name.”

  He was sweating and shaking, almost sobbing with the need to come again. “Theo!”

  I made him climax again, caught it all in my palm and rubbed it into his torso, but I held off on my own orgasm.

  After stripping off the jeans and shirt, I took him a final time on our bed, his legs over my shoulders, my hands hard on his hips. If I’d been thinking straight, I would have realized he’d have bruises in the morning, but all I knew, all that mattered, was the feel of him… his hot, tight channel, rhythmically clenching around me.

  “Say my name!”

  “Theo.” He moaned and held tight to me, panting and shivering as I pounded into him.

  “Love me, Wills.” I heard the words come out of my mouth. “Love me.”

  “Forever, babe,” he whispered. He ran his fingers down my spine, into the crevice between my asscheeks, and dipped into my hole, and I came apart.

  I braced myself above him, keeping my hips angled so my cock stayed in him as long as possible as I poured myself into the condom, and along with my climax, my fury drained out of me.

  Tremors ran up and down my arms, and they could no longer support my weight. Wills gave a slight “oof” as I collapsed onto him. I eased his legs off my shoulders, and he winced a little.

  “Sorry, babe.” I pressed a kiss to his hip. “Did I hurt you?”

  “Not in this lifetime, tiger.”